the kilowatthour

10 things in my neighborhood*

2011-07-10T18:43:00.003-04:00

Lego creations.

Breakfast.

A sculpture garden.

A view.

Playgrounds aplenty.

Sidewalks to run on.

Coffee.

A house of beer.

Corner market.

An auction house.

---
*Idea stolen, willy-nilly, from the excellent Schmutzie.

Jekyll

2010-09-08T08:54:00.001-04:00

Good times.

Regrettable

2010-08-29T11:19:00.002-04:00

Posted at my workplace is a confusing sign which begins thusly:

The family of Opal Jenkins* regrettably announces her transition.

And proceeds to announce the date and time of the "homegoing service," after which there will apparently take place a "repast."

Proud thesaurus owners: while I am sorry for your (presumable) loss, surely there is a more direct way to get your point across.

That is all.

---------

*Not her real name. Though it is an awesome name.

Bookish

2010-07-29T10:47:00.002-04:00

We had this brilliant design idea while we were still a family of two: a dozen or so small cabinets on short legs would hold our books nicely, in plain view, with room to vacuum underneath.

Our third family member agrees with the brilliance of this design, especially as it pertains to his own sense of order. Though we mostly manage to keep the books on the shelves these days, any purposefulness in their placement has long been lost.

Welcome to our bookshelves. Design by miniwatt™. (Look here for the whole set.)

My boy

2010-06-21T21:41:00.003-04:00

The miniwatt is little and big. So big, and so little. He will be three in August.

He is fully his own person now, very into Star Wars, bad guys, rockets, and cars. And princesses; he likes them, too. Today we asked him what he wanted to do when he was a grown-up, and he said, "Drink beer!" Good answer, kid.

He's a little jokester, always trying to make us laugh. And totally a hall monitor, scolding us when we break the rules. "It doesn't say walk, Mommy!"

He is my joy, my love, the best thing I've ever done.

Overheard*

2010-03-30T13:23:00.003-04:00

Gap manager, on her earpiece: "You guys, I'm seeing a lot of traffic here, so let's make sure we're Customer Servicing** everyone."

---
*Also: I'm twelve.
**Also also: no. Just no.

This one's for you, lady of the major histrionics.

2009-11-19T21:37:00.004-05:00

Parenting pro tip: if, when your kid is having surgery, you feel the need to make the experience all about you, you're doing it wrong.

Off

2009-11-16T22:06:00.002-05:00

Last night on call was strangely pleasant. No one tried to kick me or rip anything out of themselves. No one tried to die. The one person who was supposed to be sick was greatly improved by a change of scenery. The pain service pager went off blessedly infrequently. And yet I could not manage more than three hours of (third-rate) sleep. Partly the problem is that I just don't sleep well when I'm on call: those pagers stare at me, daring me to nod off. Also: I never get to stay up late, and I am a serious night-owl. Also also: I had a really terrible dream in which Mr. Hour fell off the side of a building.

Bad dream fog is still drifting around my brain.

Tomorrow, Scarlett, is another day.

Earworm

2009-11-12T23:15:00.003-05:00

(Most brilliant cover ever.)

via

Effusive, I tell you

2009-11-10T21:16:00.004-05:00

Huh. It turns out that picking the one best thing about every day is a lot harder than it sounds. Or at least picking a different thing each day, because every single day I could get downright effusive about the miniwatt's sweet face next to mine.

And then I get all confused when I'm on call overnight-- what distinguishes one day from the next? Is a call day one day or two? I don't know. This happens. (The days, they have become a blur.)

So, seeing as I've failed NaBloPoMo with flying colors, I will give myself license to write whatever I want whenever I want.

Scattered posting with a chance of intermittent updates

2009-11-07T08:55:00.001-05:00

Yesterday's best:

I was on call overnight, and it did not suck.

Frankentater

2009-11-04T16:52:00.001-05:00

Today's best: Miniwatt creations.

Bail early, bail often

2009-11-03T18:44:00.003-05:00

Right. It didn't take me long to fail NaBloPoMo, for reasons*. Let's just overlook that and move on, shall we?

Yesterday's best:
The miniwatt's happy face next to mine in the morning, completely unaware of his parents' sleepless night listening to his croupy breathing.

Today's best:
My ankle isn't broken after all.

*See today's best.

Now with more pith

2009-11-01T21:57:00.004-05:00

I am toying with the idea of this NaBloPoMo, as a way of reinserting myself into the Intertubes. Life continues apace, but without material easily converted to blog fodder. Residency? More or less off limits. Parenting? Mostly off limits. My own crippling procrastination and sloth? Likely to be an issue.

So. Attainable goals. I propose to, each day, determine what has been best about that day and tell you, gentle reader, all about it. Briefly. Pithily. With pith.

Here goes... something.

At the playground yellow ginkgo leaves paved the ground. My son stood in the sandbox, wary of the somewhat younger boy in the green frog hat. Slowly, we all let go. We talked up the boy's nice parents. We laughed. We made piles of sand and stomped them. Weightless we jumped, the three of us, into the castles we had made.

Grace in Small Things: Part One of Some

2009-06-25T21:09:00.001-04:00

1. Trying something new.
2. Spying on "circle time" at the daycare.
3. Napping on the couch post-call.
4. Wyshuck!! Ebsessess!! Peecar!!*
5. Remembering 1983 Michael Jackson.

*Firetruck!! Ambulance!! Police car!!

Time for living

2009-05-23T14:27:00.002-04:00

I am so scattered and hurried, time is so scarce, that I feel my life is constant loss. Each moment going by is irretrievable. I am trying to remember to slow down, to stop multitasking the days away.

There was a moment at the playground earlier today, when the camera's memory card had filled up, and my coffee had run dry, and I was left with no option but living in that moment. My son stood between two little girls while they all three chimed the chimes, a perfect trio of toddlerhood. My husband shared a tiny bench with me. And it was good.

We all three have this weekend off, and while we made no plans in advance we do plan to get out of our routine. No more sitting at separate computers while the boy pushes cars around. This is time for living.

Miniwatt stats

2009-03-13T22:25:00.002-04:00

At 18 months:

35 inches tall (off the charts)
24 lbs 14.5 oz (35th percentile)
(He's a string bean!)

Eats like a horse.
Speaks more words than I can count.
Knows all the letters of the alphabet.
Finally calls me mommy.
Makes my life so sweet.

I am really sorry to do this to you.

2009-03-08T22:56:00.003-04:00

And I can't bring myself to defile my blog the way my retinas have been defiled, so... here. Go watch that, if you think you can.

Yeah. There was no way I was keeping that to myself.

I am memerica, and so can you

2009-02-26T22:56:00.001-05:00

Please to enjoy my album cover.

Random thought. (Also: I am a tad slow on the uptake.)

2009-01-28T10:54:00.003-05:00

Though it has been said many times, many ways, I would like to say it here: the problem with No Child Left Behind is all the kids left behind. Smarter than average kids have got to be bored out their minds wading through a watered-down curriculum designed for the middle ground. The fact of the matter is that kids come in all shapes and sizes and degrees of ability. What's the harm in admitting that and teaching to kids' strengths?

Anyone?

The belly says ''good morning!"

2009-01-28T09:54:00.001-05:00

nom nom nom delicious belly

Helpful

2009-01-26T20:09:00.003-05:00

Seen on the way to the theater for Slumdog Millionaire:

Should I stay or should I go?

We had one of our extremely rare date nights on Saturday: dinner (with beers!) and a movie (with Twizzlers!) out by ourselves like actual adults. We can't remember the last time we had date night. This is sad.

In other news... I have the plague. I have been sick since the beginning of December and this thing shows no signs of letting up. So now I'm wantonly throwing antibiotics at it, possibly strengthening the Superbug Army.

And this is how I shall defeat them:

Things I am loving today

2009-01-24T12:56:00.002-05:00

1. Coke Zero.
2. Salt and vinegar potato chips.
3. Stephen Colbert.
4. Dancing toddlers.
5. Philip Pullman's His Dark Materials books.
6. Sunlight in my living room.
7. Sunlight! The sun is out for the first time in freaking forever!
8. Lemonheads.
9. Anticipating going on a date tonight with my delightful husband.
10. Battlestar Galactica!

Baby steps, you guys

2009-01-23T20:50:00.002-05:00

Things I have done today:

Got home from work at 7:20am.
Ate breakfast with the family.
Got the miniwatt ready for school, worried that he was limping.
Gave the miniwatt some Tylenol.
Waved goodbye.
Watched Lean on Me on TV.
Ate nabeyaki udon.
Slept on the couch for five hours.
Greeted a no longer limping miniwatt and his dad.
Played with and fed the kid, put him in bed.
Nuked some turkey chili.
Got an urge to blog again.

I'm giving it another shot, people.

My flight leaves at 6:30 in the morning and this is what I'm doing instead of packing

2009-01-02T20:42:00.001-05:00

This is how I exist

2008-10-05T13:14:00.005-04:00

I'm halfway through a four week ICU rotation. This involves 24 hour call every third day: work 24 hours, get the next day off, work a normal day, work 24 hours, etc. On weekends you may or may not get an extra day off. Today is that day for me.

I am tired.
I don't see my family enough.
The sky is gray.
My thyroid nodule is getting bigger.
I'm generally uneasy.

However:

My son is walking a little.
He loves to give hugs and kisses.
He says flower, baby, up, down, one, two, three.
He and his daddy are the light of my life.
I still love anesthesia.
I do have moments of great confidence.
I have so many good things in my life.

So when are you going to say "Mommy," kid?

This meme brought to you by my lunch bento, which is on its way.

2008-08-21T12:18:00.008-04:00

(I got it from blackbird, naturally.)

1) Copy this list into your blog or journal, including these instructions.
2) Bold all the items you have eaten.
3) Cross out any items that you would never consider eating.
4) Optional extra: Post a comment here at Very Good Taste linking to your results.

The Omnivore's Hundred

1. Venison - not a fan.
2. Nettle tea - nope.
3. Huevos rancheros - yum!
4. Steak tartare - only recently, at this place.
5. Crocodile - nope.
6. ~~Black pudding~~
7. Cheese fondue - really only a couple of times ever.
8. Carp - nope.
9. Borscht - nope.
10. Baba ghanoush - the only way I like eggplant.
11. Calamari - love.
12. Pho - all the time, can't get enough.
13. PB&J sandwich - of course.
14. Aloo gobi - one of my favorites.
15. Hot dog from a street cart, meat on a stick too - so good.
16. Epoisses - not yet.
17. Black truffle - lives up to the hype.
18. Fruit wine made from something other than grapes - maybe? not sure.
19. Steamed pork buns - I love these.
20. Pistachio ice cream - never. Not really that interested.
21. Heirloom tomatoes - I don't like tomatoes.
22. Fresh wild berries - We used to have blackberry bushes. Yum.
23. ~~Foie gras~~ - I just can't bring myself to do it.
24. Rice and beans + fried plantains = one of my favorite meals.
25. ~~Brawn, or head cheese~~ - no way.
26. ~~Raw Scotch Bonnet pepper~~ - raw? No effing way.
27. Dulce de leche - on my list of things I need to have.
28. Oysters - gross, but I can't say I'll never try them.
29. Baklava - so good!
30. Bagna cauda - no, but I'm interested.
31. Wasabi peas - I want these right now.
32. Clam chowder in a sourdough bowl - I hate clam chowder.
33. Salted lassi - lassi, yes, but never salted.
34. Sauerkraut - I've made many trips to Germany...
35. Root beer float - demonstrably the best float.
36. Cognac with a fat cigar - cigars are nasty.
37. Clotted cream tea - clotted cream is so good I might give this a shot.
38. Vodka jelly/Jell-O - maybe? It sounds like something I might have had back in the day.
39. Gumbo - now I want gumbo. Who's hungry? I am!
40. Oxtail - nope.
41. Curried goat - it was... gamey.
42. ~~Whole insects~~ - are you kidding me?
43. Phaal - not yet.
44. Goat’s milk - only incorporated into goat cheese.
45. Malt whisky from a bottle worth £60/$120 or more - did I ever mention the alcoholic trust fund kid I dated?
46. Fugu - I'm scared to try.
47. Chicken tikka masala - yes, please.
48. Eel - I love eel.
49. Krispy Kreme original glazed doughnut - duh, but I still prefer Dunkin' Donuts.
50. Sea urchin - nope.
51. Prickly pear - nope.
52. Umeboshi - not yet, but sign me up.
53. Abalone - nope, seems nasty.
54. Paneer - delicious. Why so much Indian food on here?
55. McDonald’s Big Mac Meal - so long ago.
56. Spaetzle - yum.
57. Dirty gin martini - just the way I like them.
58. Beer above 8% ABV - oh, I love beer.
59. Poutine - and then I died.
60. Carob chips - these used to be all over the place.
61. S’mores - oh, now I want S'mores!
62. Sweetbreads - I would probably try sweetbreads under the right circumstances.
63. Kaolin - ?
64. Currywurst - OH MY GOD. Where can I get currywurst in New York?
65. Durian - nope.
66. Frogs’ legs - nope.
67. Beignets, churros, elephant ears or funnel cake - yes, yes, what? and yes.
68. ~~Haggis~~ - seriously. No.
69. Fried plantain - oh yes.
70. ~~Chitterlings, or andouillette~~ - no!
71. Gazpacho - love.
72. Caviar and blini - meh.
73. Louche absinthe - I'd try it.
74. Gjetost, or brunost - you can't go wrong with cheese, right?
75. ~~Roadkill~~ - not unless I ran into some tasty bacon.
76. Baijiu - no, but Im up for it.
77. Hostess Fruit Pie - not since the 80s.
78. Snail - maybe? I don't remember.
79. Lapsang souchong - this is just tea, right? Am I missing something?
80. Bellini - delicious.
81. Tom yum - yum yum.
82. Eggs Benedict - I guess I'd try it.
83. Pocky - I love Pocky!
84. Tasting menu at a three-Michelin-star restaurant - not yet.
85. Kobe beef - also at Gyu-Kaku.
86. Hare - no!
87. Goulash - nope.
88. Flowers - yep.
89. ~~Horse~~ - just... no.
90. Criollo chocolate - I don't think I've tried this.
91. Spam - I kind of love Spam.
92. Soft shell crab - once, at the Gramercy Tavern. WOW was that tasty.
93. Rose harissa - not sure.
94. Catfish - you have to have it fresh from the river.
95. Mole poblano - yums.
96. Bagel and lox - I'm really getting hungry now.
97. Lobster Thermidor - not yet.
98. Polenta - polenta goes with everything.
99. Jamaican Blue Mountain coffee - tasted, at the farmers market.
100. Snake - tasted like chicken.

How the Futon Was Won: or, Now the Grandparents Have Someplace to Sleep Thanks to the Magic of Ikea

2008-08-20T21:03:00.011-04:00

It all started innocently enough: a giant cardboard box and a mattress rolled into a tube.

Don't be fooled, sweetcheeks. Evil lurks within.

Unpacking revealed all manner of Ikea brand torture devices.

At least all the (evil) parts were there.

No Ikea venture would be complete without your Allen wrench.

Believe me when I say: do not lose your Allen wrench.

There were wheels. And tubes.

The "instructions" for this part were... obscure.

And slats.

Mmmmmm... slats.

Getting that one part to interface with that other one there--the hinged, pinchy, slatted part--made me angry. And a bit bloodied.

Again with the "instructions." There was this one picture with an X through it next to a similar picture, unmarked. The implication being, "We suggest you assemble this correctly."

Ah, horizontal surface, I shall nap upon you.

Motherfucker is actually comfortable.

And this? The blood, sweat, and tears are for this? Ikea, you two-bit whore, you tease me with your promises of reasonably-priced Scandinavian delights only to deliver, in the end, just a futon after all.

But the miniwatt loves it. You're off the hook this time, Ikea, but I've got my eye on you. Whore.

Backup plan

2008-08-18T16:25:00.001-04:00

You know, in case the whole doctoring thing doesn't pan out.

Simple pleasures, &c.

2008-08-18T14:19:00.002-04:00

I still think the memory card slot in the side of my laptop is pretty neat.

Better late than never, right?

2008-08-10T15:34:00.006-04:00

Remember this?

Yes, I'm ghostly. I know.

When I asked for your input with the glasses? I know, that was a really long time ago. And here I am leaving you hanging for almost seven months! Where are my manners?

The results are in: my sister, Badger, and lauren are all clearly geniuses.

Yes, I chose the bottom left pair.

Miniwatt approves.

I am full of wist

2008-08-10T12:33:00.002-04:00

Spending my days with secretions and gases, needles and fluids. Wishing I had more time to spend with my family. Watching my boy grow up so fast. In two weeks he will be one year old.

There is not enough time in this world.

Miniwatt stands

2008-07-12T22:45:00.000-04:00

Happy 4th of July!

2008-07-04T14:08:00.000-04:00

In 2m 54s

Click here to Play

For this I come out of hiding

2008-05-31T11:35:00.003-04:00

(Because blackbird did it.)

The concept:

a. Type your answer to each of the questions below into Flickr Search.
b. Using only the first page, pick an image.
c. Copy and paste each of the URLs for the images into fd's mosaic maker).

The Questions:

1. What is your first name?
2. What is your favorite food? right now?
3. What high school did you go to?
4. What is your favorite color?
5. Who is your celebrity crush?
6. Favorite drink?
7. Dream vacation?
8. Favorite dessert?
9. What you want to be when you grow up?
10. What do you love most in life?
11. One Word to describe you.
12. Your flickr name.

2008-04-22T03:48:00.001-04:00

Hello, blogworld. I miss you. One of these days maybe we'll reconnect. For now, though, I'm doomed to work in the pediatric ICU for another couple of weeks. This week is nights. If I'm lucky I see my baby both for a few minutes in the morning and an hour in the evening. This is no way to live.

But enough about me. What's new with you?

I was not tagged! I'm on vacation! I do want I want!

2008-03-31T22:56:00.002-04:00

Silly book meme, always destined to turn out the same way:

1. Pick up the nearest book (of at least 123 pages).
2. Open the book to page 123.
3. Find the fifth sentence.
4. Post the next three sentences.
5. Tag five people.

The nearest book is always The Case for Mars, by Robert Zubrin, because I am always sitting here at this corner of the coffee table next to this same set of shelves.

Here are my results:

If the spacecraft is to be a single rigid structure, it can easily be made to spin by having small rocket thrusters at each of its ends fire sideways in opposite directions. However if significant amounts of artificial gravity are desired the only viable option is to go for the fast-spin/short-arm technique. In the 1960s, NASA conducted experiments with humans on rotating structures and found that, after some initial disorientation, humans could adapt to living, functioning, and moving about on structures with rotation rates as fast as 6 rpm.

Now you try! I tag you all!

Aaaaand.... go!

2008-03-28T01:44:00.001-04:00

Wow. I can't believe my time is being wasted like this. I have done almost exactly nothing since I came to work seven hours ago. There is nothing to be done. I am nothing but a placeholder until 7am.

Feel my rage.

2008-03-25T01:04:00.001-04:00

Hi, people. It's been too long since I've updated. And why am I choosing to update now? At one in the morning on a random Monday? Because now is when I have the time. I am working nights in the neonatal ICU this week, and for the moment there is absolutely nothing happening. Not one thing, thank Jeebus. A little sitting around with no demands made upon my person is just what the doctor ordered.

Things have been hard, people.

February was my month of Internal Medicine, and it could not have sucked more. Oh no, wait. I take that back--it could have sucked more had my attendings and fellow residents not been so nice. And if I had not had The Best Medical Student Ever as a part of my team. So let me rephrase: despite the truly delightful people with whom I worked, a month of medicine just about killed me.

Allow me to enumerate:

1. Cancer. All cancer all the time, as I was the Lymphoma Intern.

2. Q4 call, meaning I was on call every 4th day/night.

3. Being on call meant covering all the other cancers, too. All cancer, all the time. 60+ patients to cover overnight, some of whom had the audacity to be really freaking sick. I sent someone to the ICU every single time I was on call.

4. Social work rounds. Every morning I had to go through all my patients with the entire social work team. I'm not sure I have the energy to even explain the horror of social work rounds. Imagine facing a firing squad and asking them very politely for their educated opinions, and then letting them shoot you.

5. Cancer. People trying to die all the damn time.

6. Rounds. Especially rounds on the weekend, which were known to last as long as 7 hours.

7. 90 hour weeks. It's brutal.

I ended the month with a Thursday call, which meant I was post-call on Friday and released from my shackles. I went home and sat in the bathtub with the hot water running over me, and I cried. I cried and cried for my poor patients; ultimately I could do nothing for them. How do internists stand it? I am not cut out for that sort of thing.

And now I'm in the NICU, taking care of the teeny teenies. They're cute, but I almost pass out every time I hear the scary birth stories. So much can go so wrong with these little lives. I'm not cut out for this sort of thing either.

What I am cut out for is lying on my couch, eating, snorgling my son, and watching America's Next Top Model. I hear there's good money in that sort of thing.

(P.S. What I do slightly more often than blogging here, is tweet: http://twitter.com/kilowatthour)

Today is my first legitimate day off in two weeks

2008-03-01T13:12:00.001-05:00

Here's what I've been missing:

Dadadadadad from kilowatthour on Vimeo.

Here's hoping

2008-02-05T21:30:00.000-05:00

I do not have enough days off. Not enough at all.

2008-01-30T21:02:00.000-05:00

Hello. I would like to quit my job, please. I am tired of being exploited as cheap labor. I am tired of double standards in scheduling. I am tired.

I have a week and a half left in the ICU. The February schedule just came out tonight, and I think it's fair to say that I HAVE BEEN SCREWED.

That's all I have to say about that.

In other news: the miniwatt had his first cold/fever over the weekend. It was pretty much the saddest thing ever, and now for some reason he has decided he will not drink from a bottle. At all. Even though he has been 100% bottle fed for an entire month now. He's just having none of it, thank you very much. When the bottle approaches, he howls like a baby Wookie. Which would be hilarious if he wasn't so upset. With the screaming. Wow.

I just discovered Stevie Wonder, y'all. He so totally rocks.

And it is sad that I am in such a foul mood right now, because everything seemed so rosy this morning. The sun was shining, and I was home with my baby, and we went out to lunch! With my wonderful friend Z! So I guess things aren't so terrible.

Though arguably they'd be so much better if I quit my job.

Recorded on my phone at 6am*

2008-01-21T21:35:00.000-05:00

My son's new thing: continual, high-pitched commentary.

-------
*You might have to turn the volume way up for this.

You be the judge

2008-01-19T20:07:00.000-05:00

Ignore my terrifying demeanor; just tell me which frames I should get.

If I weren't so busy being miserable, I might just be happy right now

2007-12-31T19:17:00.001-05:00

Vacation was swell, Christmas was great, and now we have the New Year. I am back at work in the ICU, a situation that mostly sucks but still hurts me less than the ED (that's what we're calling the ER these days--take me to the Emergency Department, thank you very much). Did I mention how much I hated working in the ED? Oh, right. I did mention that.

Working in the ICU does have its drawbacks, number one of which being 24 hour call. My heart breaks right in two every time I say to my baby, "I'll see you tomorrow." The work itself is mostly harmless, with a dash of extremely nerve-wracking. I'm still awaiting my first "code." You know, when someone tries to up and die on me. Chest compressions and shocks and all that. Good times.

As much as I am deeply hating this year, I'm still more or less convinced I still want to be a doctor. This will not stop me from proclaiming on a daily basis my intent to just quit and run away to the Netherlands or Montana or some other magical place where surely people do not have to work and pay off their hundreds of thousands of dollars of student loan debt.

I've heard good things about Iceland.

And I'm (slowly but surely) reading The House of God; it's not helping. I think medical training is still as dehumanizing as ever, regardless of our diminished work hours and whatever else. I certainly feel like less of a person now than I did six months ago.

Definitely more of a person.

Anyway... this too shall pass. In the meantime I will try like hell to enjoy what I can of each and every day.

Happy New Year, internets.

Merry Christmas

2007-12-25T11:58:00.000-05:00

Good morning, friends.

2007-12-11T09:50:00.001-05:00

There is nothing that will make a Tuesday morning seem more glorious than its decidedly not being the several nights before.

I am at home, the sun is shining, and no one is trying to have a heart attack in front of me. There is poop, yes, but not adult poop in adult diapers.

People, I hate the ER. Or, more specifically, I hate a lot of what happens in the ER. Some things are okay. Like the lady who fell on her knee and needed stitches and I got to put them in! I liked that. Or the guy who was obviously very ill and needed to go to the ICU, and I made that happen. That was good, too.

I'm less fond of the potential cardiac case. The ROMI, the rule-out, the rule out MI. So far I haven't seen a clear cut case of myocardial infarction, just these people with a more or less convincing story with a less convincing EKG. So they sit in the ER while we wait for their labs to come back. And we give them oxygen and aspirin and beta blockers because these are the things proven to decrease mortality. And they sit and wait and totally feel fine, and are annoyed at me because it seems like I'm ignoring them while I see five or six more patients. And then their cardiac enzymes are slightly elevated, so we need to send another set. And the patient still feels fine, and the EKG still looks okay, but we go ahead and start them on a heparin drip just in case they might be trying to have a damn heart attack while they sit there feeling fine.

Those are the ones that make me nervous.

The ones that make me very tired indeed are the ones whose complaints are ANYTHING BUT an emergency. I understand that for some people the ER is the only place they know to go for medical care. I do understand that. And I understand that most of the general public have a not very sophisticated knowledge of what is and is not a medical emergency. But it's hard not to be irritated when you pick up the chart and read "abdominal pain, diarrhea x 2 days, no fever, no vomiting" and you see the patient cheerfully sitting and chatting with the patient next to her who "might have passed out" on the subway. I ask you, internets, would you go to the ER if you had some diarrhea? Would you? And then if the doctor uttered that most-uttered phrase "it sounds like a gastroenteritis to me" and told you it would go away on its own in a few days, would you be incredibly irritated? I don't know. Maybe you would, since you've just waited around all day. Clearly you thought your diarrhea was something major, or you wouldn't be there. Right? I am trying to understand you, internets.

And, internets, if you brought your decrepit mother into the ER because she seems confused and like she might be having a stroke, would you fixate upon her teeth and insist that she have a dentist come see her in the ER right now? Because dental hygiene is an important part of the management of acute stroke, obviously.

This is all to say: there is a reason I chose not to go into Emergency Medicine. It is almost the opposite of what I want to do with my life. I will be glad when this week is over.

The end.

Sometimes things seem so serious

2007-12-04T21:06:00.000-05:00

Thanks for the encouragement after my last post. There are definitely times when I think this life I've chosen is not sustainable. I have fantasies of quitting. Then I could be with the miniwatt all the time! And make more babies!

And drown in debt. But it's still a popular fantasy around here.

Making things more difficult to bear is the recent death of a resident in my program. It's not something I really want to talk about here, but it is something that has cast a bit of darkness over, well, everything.

Okay, almost everything.

I find it hard to complain when I have THIS INSANE CUTENESS right here next to me.

I suppose I can do anything for four weeks.

2007-12-02T20:44:00.000-05:00

I am struggling a little bit. I'm halfway through a rotation in the Emergency Department, and I pretty much hate it. My confidence level is not so high.

I hate that I'm working nights Wednesday through Sunday of this week.

I hate that some of the nurses are assholes.

I hate that I basically don't know what to do most of the time.

Somehow this rotation has me feeling bad about myself.

Things you never thought would happen

2007-11-27T10:42:00.000-05:00

I find myself in a very weird position right now, sitting in front of the computer alone in my apartment while my baby is out on a walk with the nanny.

My heart hurts.

Oh, hi there. Remember me?

2007-11-12T09:23:00.000-05:00

Last time I checked in I was finishing up my first stint as an intern in the ICU. I was impressed with the lengthy hours and complicated patients. Three weeks later I am just now reading the blogs again, and only because I AM ON VACATION, BITCHES. That's right: vacation. Sweet, sweet vacation.

The last three weeks have been unremitting torture. I was on a thoracic surgery rotation that actually could have been much worse, since I was assigned to the lightest of four thoracic services, and I was able to go home at a more or less reasonable hour most days. And by reasonable I still pretty much mean inhumane. This last week I worked approximately 90 hours. And I know I shouldn't complain, since work hours for residents are actually now much lighter than they were back in the day, but SERIOUSLY. It sucks worse than you can know to spend so much more time with my patients than with my baby.

My mom was here for the last 2.5 weeks taking care of the little boy, and my mother-in-law had been with us for the previous three weeks. Without them there is no way I would have survived. Even with them I barely did--five hours of sleep is not enough for a woman trying to work 14 hours a day, breastfeed, and remain conscious. The upside? I've lost a lot of weight.

My last day on thoracic surgery was a doozy. It was Cardiac Event Day, apparently. Everyone decided to have some life-threatening cardiac problem just after everyone else went home Friday night leaving me alone and on call. If it hadn't been for the help of a few individuals I might have just had a cardiac event myself. As it was I had pretty much decompensated by the time I went home--I had been awake for over thirty hours, most of that time spent staring at the cardiac monitors and worrying. In all those thirty hours I had not had the time to use my breast pump, and that was the thing that made me cry in the end. The choice of whether or not to breastfeed is being made for me, and it hurts.

Being an intern is not easy.

AND. This vacation is much deserved, if I do say so myself.

I slept for eight hours last night! You're welcome!

This is what makes my long days both easier and harder to bear

2007-10-22T22:36:00.000-04:00

Quiet

2007-10-20T00:56:00.001-04:00

I'm halfway through my last night of this week of night float. Night float = me working at night, taking care of all the patients in the ICU. Right now things are quiet, but there is always potential for some crazy, crazy shenanigans.

Like last night, when a lady pulled out her own arterial line. Pulling things out of arteries tends to make big blood puddles. Fun! The nurse called me and couldn't even articulate what was going on*, just asked me to come. And I was strangely unimpressed, really. Puddle of blood? Meh. I put in another arterial line. Aaaand... done.

Tonight I may get a little nap, though every time I say that I cringe a little, knowing I'm jinxing myself heavily. Last night started out quiet, too.

----------------
*She said later, "I walked in and thought she looks like she got hit by a truck, but there's no truck here."

Stuff

2007-10-15T15:40:00.000-04:00

Still here.
Surviving.
Sleep is at a premium.
Working nights this week.
Will update soon.

Because I'm trying to pretend I'm not going back to work in the morning

2007-10-02T21:25:00.001-04:00

A meme! Courtesy of laurenrene.
(For purposes of this meme, my name is Kilo Watt Hour.)

1. Your rock star name
(first pet & current car)
Heidi Mutsy*

2.Your gangsta name
(fav ice cream flavor, favorite cookie)
Vanilla Ranger

3. Your Fly Guy / Girl name
(first initial of first name, first three letters of your last name)
K-HOU

4. Your detective name
(favorite color, favorite animal)
Green Otter

5. Your soap opera name
(middle name, city where you were born)
Watt Atlanta

6. Your Star Wars name
(the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first)
Houki

7. Superhero name
(2nd favorite color, favorite drink put “The”)
Red the Buckshot**

8. Nascar name
(the first names of your grandfathers)
This one is really funny, but I decline to put my grandfather's real names on here. So let's just say it's Benny Benjamin.

9. Stripper name
(the name of your favorite perfume/cologne, favorite candy)
Anna Sui Lemonhead

10.Witness protection name
(mother’s & father’s middle names )
Ann Watt

11. TV weather anchor name
(Your 5th grade teacher’s last name, a major city that starts with the same letter)
Fedler Frankfurt

12. Spy name
(your favorite season/holiday, flower)
Spring Iris

13. Cartoon name
(favorite fruit, article of clothing you’re wearing right now + “ie” or “y”)
Apple Pantsy

14. Hippie name
(What you ate for breakfast, your favorite tree),
Toast Dogwood

15. Your rockstar tour name
(”The” + Your fave hobby/craft, fave weather element + “Tour”)
The Viola Thunderstorm Tour

-------
*I have no car. But I do have this stroller.
**Buckshot = Wild Turkey + Coke

My boy is 5 weeks old today

2007-09-28T12:44:00.000-04:00

Oh, internets. My maternity leave is almost over, and I am sad. Sad mostly because I will be leaving my little boy for sometimes 24 hours at a time, and sad also because I will be working. Work = lame.

The miniwatt continues to grow and thrive. Some days are better than others for me. Take yesterday, for instance. The boy was eating or crying, all day long. If he was awake, he needed to be held, and he refused to sleep. This made for a somewhat exhausting day. The only way either of us could get any rest was for me to feed him whilst lying down in my bed, drifting off to sleep for a couple of sweet hours.

Today is a better day. Little mini was awake and happy for a couple of hours earlier, cooing and gooing and being generally adorable. And now he is peacefully sleeping in his ridiculously cute bassinet. I have reason to believe he will remain asleep for at least another half an hour. This is awesome.

There is a part of me that wants to quit the whole doctoring thing and just stay home with my baby forever. This part of me firmly believes that I am an insane person for trying to be a freaking intern while having a tiny baby at home. Wait, no, that's every part of me. But there is also a small, very timid part of me that is almost okay with going back to work. Almost okay.

I'm not excited about trying to pump breastmilk while working 12 or 24 hour shifts in the ICU.

I am excited about the fact that I may actually get more sleep while on call in the ICU than I do at home.

I am super duper extremely NOT EXCITED about the fact that we didn't get a spot in the daycare center that is in our building. The waiting list is epically long, and we can't realistically expect to get in there until the middle of next year. At least. Had we known that, we might have had a backup plan. The plan very quickly has become weeks-long visits from each grandmother until we can find a nanny. Goodbye, savings!

And now I'm going to do... something. Something, anything at all, that takes advantage of the sweet boy's naptime. Perhaps I will shave my legs. Can you feel the excitement?

Wish me luck, internets. I go back to work next Wednesday.

Hmmm

2007-09-16T14:10:00.000-04:00

I would describe my son as a--how do you say--handful.

Snorglable

2007-09-14T22:32:00.000-04:00

Goodbyes

2007-09-08T00:52:00.001-04:00

We've lost Luciano Pavarotti and Madeleine L'Engle in the same week.

I think it's time to get this. And maybe reread this.

Milestones

2007-09-06T10:48:00.000-04:00

I just picked my son's nose for the first time; he smiled in his sleep.

In a couple of hours we head out for our first outing with the stroller. Wish us luck.

One of these days I'll put some pictures online. Bear with me. Brainpower is in short supply.

A little (tiny! so cute and tiny!) update

2007-08-30T17:22:00.001-04:00

We're coming up on a week of miniwattage here, and things are fantastic. There was a minor hiccup involving a return to the hospital for some phototherapy, but we're back and happy and healthy and OH MY GOD I HAVE THE CUTEST BABY.

His current activities include:

Thanks for all the well-wishing and gift-sending and general sharing of our happiness. You guys are the bestest. I'll post as I can...

Miniwatt

2007-08-26T17:34:00.001-04:00

A miniwatt is born

2007-08-26T09:27:00.000-04:00

August 24th, 2007, 1:08am
8 lbs., 5 oz., 21.5 inches
10 fingers, 10 toes
Practically perfect in every way.

Brain scrambled, will attempt post regardless

2007-08-22T15:11:00.000-04:00

So here's the deal:

Monday I thought maybe my water had broken. Maybe? A little? I don't know. Without getting too graphic on you, let's just say it's a moist state of affairs at this stage of pregnancy and things are a little confusing.

So.

I went to Labor and Delivery and went through the whole monitoring and examining spiel, only to be sent away feeling tender and violated. (Speculum exam to rule out rupture of membranes? NO THANK YOU.) The process took nearly all damn day, so that was one work day down for the week.

Monday night I could not even begin to sleep through all the uterine turmoil. Contractions + bucking bronco baby = happy happy joy joy.

Tuesday morning I had had enough. I put myself on maternity leave and called my doctor to schedule an induction.

This induction is for my comfort, mostly. But also I am progressing (>3cm dilated, >80% effaced, mucus plug gone, contractions all the damn time, PLUS tomorrow is 39 weeks exactly) without really progressing over here. I'm sure if I walked around for a couple of hours I'd just fall straight into labor. I may not even really need to be induced.

So, if the baby doesn't get with it before then, labor will be induced at 5:00pm tomorrow. And then there will be a little miniwatt for us all to love! (He says hi, by the way, in the form of swift and painful kicks to my ribcage.)

(Now officially out of the running with the wager: sgazzetti, LetterB, caduceus13 (budding OB/GYN himself), and probably my sister.)

It occurs to me

2007-08-17T06:19:00.000-04:00

As much as it sucks (SUUUUUCKS) to be working in mah condition (Magnolia-flavored accent recommended), I would go crazy if I was staying at home.

You know you want to get in on this action [UPDATED as the bids roll in]

2007-08-16T17:47:00.000-04:00

Place your bets now, people. When do you think the miniwatt will be born? And, for bonus points, what shall be his dimensions? The bidding has been opened, thusly:

August 20th, 7 lbs. 2 oz., 20 inches, 6am (sgazzetti)
August 21st, 7 lbs. 7 oz., 21 inches (LetterB)
August 21st, 7 lbs. 15 oz., 21 inches (my friend P/caduceus***)
August 22nd, 7 lbs. 6 oz., 22 inches (my sister)
August 23rd, 7 lbs. 10 oz., 20 inches (Philip)
August 24th, 8 lbs. 8 oz., 22 inches (my mom)
August 25th, 8 lbs. 1 oz., 21 inches (Badger)
August 27th, 7 lbs. 7 oz., 20 inches (jagosaurus)
August 28th, 8 lbs. 5 oz., at dusk (juliloquy)
August 28th, 7 lbs. 2 oz. (lauren)
August 29th, 8 lbs. 4 oz., 20 1/2 inches (blackbird)
August 30th, 7 lbs. 5 oz. (Action Jackson)
August 31st, 8 lbs. 2 oz., 22 inches (jenB)
August 31st, 8 lbs. 2 oz., 20 1/2 inches (ottavina)
September 1st, 7 lbs. 6 oz., 21 inches (Dr. J)*
September 2nd, 6 lbs. 11 oz., 20 inches (jess)
September 3rd, 7 lbs. 7 oz., 21 inches (vague, alfina the)
September 3rd, 7 lbs. 4 oz., 21 1/2 inches (nejyerf)
September 4th, 7 lbs. 11 oz., 21 inches (my friend M)**
September 5th, 7 lbs. on the nose (FP)

The official due date is August 30th, and ultrasound-predicted weight is 7 lbs. 5 oz.

Wager now, while the wagerin's hot! Leave guesses in comments, or email thekilowatthour at gmail dot com.

(Prize either TBA or mythical. Possibly both.)
(Right now I exempt myself from this game--after our little false alarm last night (oh, did I not tell you that story? Remind me to do that) I feel like this may never happen.)

*That's about average size, I'd say. (apologies to users of the (much more useful) metric system)
**My exact measurements at birth...
***Whom I have allowed to change the due date in exchange for patiently listening to every last detail of my early labor experience.

UPDATED to add: why are you people not guessing TODAY?? Or at the very latest tomorrow?

Naming

2007-08-09T17:14:00.000-04:00

I have finally decided upon a middle name for my child: Internet.

Try it out! It works with almost any combination of names.

Anniversary

2007-08-04T15:16:00.001-04:00

Last Monday was our fourth wedding anniversary. We had anticipated not having time to go out on that day, so we went out the night before. Our grand plan involved the restaurant where we had our first date, a little place called A. Like the subway line:

We went there for our first date. The place was tiny, seating maybe a total of 18 people, and served some of the best food we've had here in New York. And now it's gone. We took a cab over there only to find it closed. And then we walked to another place we liked in the area, and that was closed, too. Our old neighborhood appears to be shriveling up and dying. So sad.

So, though we did end up having a lovely dinner, it was not exactly what we had planned.

Nor was what happened on our actual anniversary part of the original plan; we ate at the Gramercy Tavern. My cousin had just arrived in town for a little shopping trip with her daughter, who is turning sixteen on Wednesday. Gramercy Tavern was amazing. We all ordered from the prix fixe menu which includes two courses plus dessert for $76. If we hadn't added the gazillion dollar bottle of wine on top of that I almost wouldn't feel guilty about the expense. But let's not talk about that. Let's talk about what I ate: soft shell crab, hanger steak and braised short rib, and chocolate bread pudding for dessert. Everything was fantastic. I would like some of that bread pudding RIGHT NOW, thank you. The restaurant itself is posh without being uncomfortable, with attentive and friendly waiters. The wine list is epic: check it out. (We Others at my table had the 2005 Turley Old Vines Zinfandel. It was lovely. Or so I'm told.)

Stay tuned for accounts of the continuing comedy of errors which is our attempt to set up our baby's room. Monitor my expansion here.

-----------------
P.S. Happy anniversary to my sister, tomorrow! She and mr. kt have been married seven years now, which officially makes me old.

It's aliiiiive!

2007-07-24T17:51:00.000-04:00

There is some seriously alien shit going on over here. The miniwatt continues to be quite rambunctious; I sit in lecture in the afternoons wondering if his gyrations will launch me out of my seat. Yes, you can see all this fetal activity from across the room. Alien, I tell you.

This Thursday marks 35 weeks, which means we have a mere two weeks until the little guy is officially at full term. We're just finishing up with the lung development. Maybe that's why he's exercising so much? I don't know.

I do know that's he's sideways, and for some reason my OB thinks that merits another ultrasound. Who am I to argue? I love ultrasound! Wheeeee! (Although it probably won't be as much fun anymore since he's gotten bigger--the views won't be as good.)

I haven't listened to him with my stethoscope in a while. Maybe I'll do that right now.

[PAUSE FOR AUSCULTATION OF MINIWATT]

Nothing. Nada. Well, nothing except several solid kicks and/or punches to the uterine wall. Listening is less compelling when the movement is near constant.

Anyway, there's a baby in me. Can we just think about how surreal that is for a second?

I think I'm done babbling now. Clearly sleep deprivation born of Harry Potter obsession is addling my brains. Perhaps I shall nap. Goodnight, sweet internets.

What once was lost is now found

2007-07-24T16:37:00.000-04:00

Did I tell you how our crib got lost? Seems unlikely, I know. We ordered this kickass crib which was to be delivered in three boxes directly from the store last Thursday before 8pm. Thursday night I was excited to see two Stokke boxes in the lobby labeled with my name. I talked to the doorman and the mailroom guy and told them I would send my husband down to get them.

By the time Philip went to get them the next day, they were gone. Completely disappeared. And we got the entire doorman army on the defensive by even asking what had happened to those boxes. Clearly the insane pregnant woman had made up the entire scenario! No package had ever disappeared before! This could not be!

Philip managed to talk to the guy who was on during the day on Friday, who got a faraway look in his eye and said something about UPS picking up some boxes. Since this seemed to not have much to do with us, we asked the building manager to take a look at the security tapes to shed some light on the situation. The store had already faxed a copy of their delivery manifest showing that one of the Doorman Army had indeed received and signed for my two boxes (we got box number 3 on Friday with no problems.)

And then this afternoon the store called me with an amusing tale of two boxes returning to them via UPS, which they hadn't even used in the first place.

The crib is on its way--and the store won't leave the boxes with the doorman this time, no sir.

Thoughts (this is about as complex as they get right now)

2007-07-19T18:15:00.001-04:00

I am 34 weeks pregnant today.
I am tired.
Anesthesia is fun.
Also somewhat scary.
I don't feel quite as dumb this week.
I am tired.
Seven hours of sleep is not enough.
I don't know the meaning of tired yet, I am told.
Attendings are starting to leave me alone during cases.
I get to spend my days with the machine that goes BING!
My baby is transverse and fond of kicking my liver.
I am uncomfortable a lot of the time.
I am tired.

Highlights

2007-07-12T17:21:00.000-04:00

These first two weeks of my internship have been really mostly fun but also quite exhausting. Despite my efforts to get eight hours of sleep a night, I am constantly on the brink of unconsciousness. This does little to enhance my learning abilities which are already impaired enough by Placenta Brain. So I have this sneaking suspicion that I'm being singled out as The Dumb One among the interns. Oh well. Maybe I'll be smarter after I have a baby? (Please do not shatter my illusions. I am warning you.)

Stringing together all these words is making me tired, so I think I'll resort to making a nice list for you now.

FUN MOMENTS IN MY CAREER SO FAR

the attending who told me she was tired of me
screwing up an IV in a manner which necessitated a change of scrubs
eliciting exasperated sighs from another attending who was clearly tired of me
secretions
early morning orthostatic hypotension (my own)
cutting myself on glass vials of fentanyl, lidocaine, and ephedrine
leaving an attending a message so long the voicemail cut me off
my first paycheck: considerably less than everyone else's
my name: misspelled in two or three different ways
being left alone with a patient at the end of a case, inappropriately
said patient vomiting while still groggy from anesthesia
entire surgical team staring at me as I tried to disentangle monitors and lines while making sure the patient is not inhaling her own vomit
argh

Mostly I just kind of feel dumb all the time.

Oh, glorious internets

2007-07-07T21:00:00.000-04:00

I made it an entire week without internet access, y'all. It was hard. There was much to talk about during this week, what with the moving and the starting work and the et cetera, but honestly I was too tired to sit and write much of anything anyway.

So. Tired.

Work is challenging, but good. The challenges are not more than I can handle (so far) and I don't even really mind getting up before 6am. Shocking. At this point I am not really allowed to be left alone in an operating room, so there's always help available. This is a good thing. No one wants me in charge right now.

And that is about all I can muster up for right now. I think I'll go tackle some laundry before collapsing in a heap in front of my newly installed TiFaux.

I am a busy little bee.

2007-06-29T18:05:00.000-04:00

Orientation: done
ID card: acquired
Apartment: secured
Move-in date: set for Sunday
OB appointment: attended (30 minute wait for a 30 second appointment)
Movers: hired
Money order for movers: purchased
Cable TV + internet: installation scheduled*
Utilities: cancelled
Change of address: filed with every conceivable institution that might care
Harry Potter: pre-ordered

----------
*And now we enter a dark time: one week without internet access in our home. July 7th shall be a joyous day, and there shall be much rejoicing.

Things are happening

2007-06-29T00:22:00.001-04:00

I haven't been writing much about the coming storm, but the storm is coming anyway. On Monday I start my intern year, a year during which my work will be restricted to a mere eighty hours per week. A year during which I will have my first child. A year during which I will try very hard not to kill anyone.

I am somewhat terrified.

To start the year off right, we have only the vaguest notion of when and where we get to move; signs point to a move on Sunday into a two bedroom apartment across the street from the hospital. Packing is progressing quite slowly. We have just found the boxes that never quite got unpacked when we moved in to this apartment four years ago. How could I have been living all this time without my Coke bottle-shaped opera glasses?

Tomorrow I have orientation* exercises all day long, plus an OB appointment. There's not much time left in there for figuring out housing crap and hiring movers on two days' notice.

What I would really like is another nice spa day.

Oh well. I suppose I'll take me to bed now and try to dream nice, relaxing dreams.

-------------------
*Did I tell you about Monday's orientation? From 8am to 5pm? After we had taken the red-eye from San Francisco and arrived at 7am? No? Let's just say that day suuuuuucked.

Words for my air-conditioner

2007-06-27T18:28:00.000-04:00

Hello, fine appliance. Please to be turning back on with the cooling function lest I expire in this heat. Thank you.

Pitchers

2007-06-27T00:37:00.000-04:00

We went wine tasting! I took pictures! You can see them: here.

And now back to our regular programming

2007-06-26T09:21:00.001-04:00

Hello, internets! I am back from a lovely vacation during which I utterly failed to take an adequate number of pictures. The only documented parts of the trip are the Georgia Aquarium and wine tasting in Dry Creek Valley, but I can promise you there was much niece-snorgling both in Atlanta and San Francisco.

It was surprisingly nice to take a little break from my obsessive blog-reading (though of course I was crushed to have missed out on your blog all week long) and email-checking. I was shocked to find out that the consequences of not checking my email for an entire day are not that dire. In fact I would say that most of my email is boring and useless and I'm not sure why I'm so desperate to be checking it all the damn time. I'm just saying.

So. Now that I'm back, I have a meme! That I lifted from BabelBabe! Enjoy.

THE ONE WORD MEME

1. Where is your mobile phone? bag
2. Relationship? peaceful
3. Your hair? unstyled
4. Work? soon
5. Your sister(s)? awesome
6. Your favourite thing? food?
7. Your dream last night? convoluted
8. Your favourite drink? coffee
9. Your dream car? hybrid
10. The room you're in? living
11. Your shoes? off
12. Your fears? repressed
13. What do you want to be in 10 years? rested
14. Who did you hang out with this weekend? family
15. What are you not good at? money
16. Muffin? none
17. Wish list item? apartment
18. Where you grew up? Atlanta
19. The last thing you did? sneezed
20. What are you wearing? maternity
21. What are you not wearing? makeup
22. Your pet? none
23. Your computer? various
24. Your life? excellent
25. Your mood? content
26. Missing? pets
27. What are you thinking about? babies
28. Your car? none
29. Your kitchen? gross
30. Your summer? full
31. Your favourite colour? green
32. Last time you laughed? today
33. Last time you cried? yesterday
34. School? DONE!!!
35. Love? essential

Hello! I am here!

2007-06-22T12:00:00.001-04:00

And here in this case is California! After the glucose test and restorative spa treatment last Friday we flew to Atlanta to spend a few days with my sister and her entirely edible little baby. And now we are in California with Philip's family and the other four nieces. It's all quite lovely and I am trying so hard not to think about the fact that in about 10 days I'll be getting up before dawn and knocking people out all day long...

We'll get back to our regular programming once we're back home. Please excuse this interruption in service.

Tasty

2007-06-15T13:24:00.000-04:00

I keep clicking over to my other blog over there at vox just to catch another glimpse of Evil Spader. I might not ever write another post over there; it could just be a place where I keep a picture. You know?

Superfantastic

2007-06-14T17:04:00.000-04:00

So you know that glucose test I took the other day? The one that made me barf up my lunch afterwards? Yeah, I failed that. So I get to do the Super Deluxe Three Hour version tomorrow morning.

100 grams of glucose
four blood draws
16 hours of fasting

I think I won't have Chinese food afterwards.

What I will have is a Mom-To-Be spa package given to me by Philip's family as a graduation present. He comes from good people, my Philip.

More metaphors*

2007-06-13T23:24:00.000-04:00

THE METAPHORS, THEY FLOW LIKE WINE
net full of eels
wave pool
earthquake
100 dropped tennis balls
pizza dough, making of

-------
*See previous metaphors here.

Barfy

2007-06-12T16:29:00.000-04:00

I'm not feeling so hot right now.

This morning I went to see my OB for my 28 week visit, a visit which included getting a shot and having some blood drawn. The blood was to test my body's response to the disgusting orange glucose drink I had consumed one hour earlier after fasting for 12 hours. The shot was Rhogam, and it hurt like a bitch.

After my appointment I had a little lunch and then a little coffee and rice krispie treat, but only a little of the latter two as I began to feel woozy and faint and proceeded to lose my entire lunch at the Barnes & Noble. Luckily I made it to the bathroom first.

The saddest part was leaving my half-eaten and -drunk treats behind.

Now I'm equal parts hungry and nauseous. I'm gonna go try to figure out a solution to this problem.

More fun than a barrel of monkeys*

2007-06-10T13:12:00.000-04:00

If you haven't done it already, I encourage you to browse (and join!) the Choking Hazards group on Flickr. Sprung from the collective genius of isoglossia and Hillbilly, Please, this group seeks to document the truly tiny. And not in any public servicey way, either. Just pictures of small things for the hell of it, okay? Seriously. Check it out.

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*Or, you know, a box of cocktail monkeys.

So many choices, so few babies

2007-06-09T23:16:00.000-04:00

Somewhere--and I cannot retrace my steps adequately to find out where--recently I came across a mention of Nymbler, this cool baby-naming site. Now, it may or may not be true that my baby already has a name, but that doesn't mean I can't play with the babynamer. Right? And who knows, we might even get our minds changed by one of these fantastic candidates. (Click on the picture to see my recent, completely awesome finds.)

And why not Algernon, really?

Enjoying...

2007-06-08T15:20:00.000-04:00

...once again the ultrasound picture from our anatomy scan that has a little cursor arrow labelled in a gray faint enough to escape notice on the first several viewings: BOY PARTS.

Awesome.

In case there was any residual doubt...

2007-06-06T21:28:00.001-04:00

...here is further proof I have chosen wisely with this whole medicine thing.

Today during my ACLS (Advanced Cardiovascular Life Support, i.e. jacked-up CPR) course I got a little bit giddy and thought to myself, "This is so much freaking fun."

That's right, people. A lecture on tachycardia coupled with a little guidebook full of emergency medications kind of tipped me over the edge. Enough said.

Piracy, sauce, and metaphors

2007-06-03T18:31:00.000-04:00

We went to see the pirate movie last night. A good time was had by all (me, my mom, Philip, the miniwatt) if you discount the broken air-conditioning system in the theater. There's nothing quite like stewing in the juices of a hundred strangers for three action-packed hours. Tasty!

Before the movie we ate at our favorite pre-movie venue: the Waterfront Ale House, which is not on the water at all. It is, however, a fantastic Ale House with a not-too-shabby restaurant as part of the bargain.

Aside from the respectable and ever-changing beer list, the repertoire of sauces is most impressive. I counted (and photographed) no fewer than eleven sauces available at each table.

Not documented: various mustards.

After a hearty meal (mini lamb burgers for my mom, fish and chips for Philip, pulled chicken sandwich for me) we procured our movie treats at the drugstore. Who wants to pay $8 for 4 Twizzlers when you can get a pound for $3.75? No one, that's who! Philip and I demolished the pound of contraband Twizzlers, washing them down with an 80 gallon Coke. The miniwatt took note about 2/3 of the way through the movie and started freaking the hell out.

Which has inspired me to list for you various metaphors used to describe the increasingly rambunctious stylings of the miniwatt.

CHOICEST METAPHORS*
sneakers in the dryer
giant butterflies
octopus
rotisserie chicken
rumblepad

There are more, I'm sure, but this curry rice thing my mom is making smells so good my brain has turned off. (See asterisk for proof.) Stick a fork in me I'm done.

----------------
*Q: What's a metaphor? A: To keep cows in!**
**I'm sorry. I couldn't help myself.

Drink up

2007-06-01T00:51:00.000-04:00

Congratulatory flowers from my sister-in-law. That's right, bitches. I'm a doctor now. Graduation post pending.

How great is this picture?

2007-05-31T19:16:00.000-04:00

Something tells me Serena Williams won her match at the French Open today.

New blog name?

2007-05-30T00:44:00.001-04:00

Watching the Crufts dog show on Animal Planet tonight I heard the announcer utter the absolute best phrase ever; he called an entrant a "glorious bitch." I hope and pray that one day someone calls me a glorious bitch.

Heartbeat

2007-05-28T00:35:00.001-04:00

Today was the first time I managed to hear my son's heartbeat with my stethoscope. Now I may not be able to quit.

Road trip

2007-05-24T13:05:00.000-04:00

Philip and I are about to head out for North Carolina for my granddaddy's funeral. It being Memorial Day weekend and all, flying was not so much of an option. So, road trip.

My cousin's wife was thoughtful enough to call every family member she could think of the other day to let us each talk to my granddaddy one last time. He was unable to respond, but seemed to understand. It was so good to be able to say goodbye. I was better able that way to wrap my head around the idea of him dying. And then he did die, peacefully, in his sleep. His death was the best death we could ask for.

I will be without internets until Sunday. Whatever shall I do? I feel slightly panicky.

Wish me luck as I go say goodbye to Dr. H.

This is just about all that has gotten through to me in lecture so far today

2007-05-23T10:55:00.000-04:00

FUN WORDS I'VE HEARD TODAY

flavin
Quantum Dots
wells of cells
filipin

(If anything else gets through, I may add to this list. You know, or not.)

Oh, Onion, how I love you

2007-05-22T10:27:00.000-04:00

"An IHOP meal should be a straightforward relationship between an individual and some pancakes."

I couldn't agree more.

Modern-Day Martin Luther Nails 95 Comment Cards To IHOP Door

And so I made quiche

2007-05-21T21:36:00.000-04:00

Isn't it pretty?

Mememememe

2007-05-21T13:26:00.000-04:00

Swiped from all over the damn place.

If I was an hour of the day... I would be 3:00am.
If I was a planet... I would be Saturn.
If I was a direction... I would be Southeast.
If I was a piece of furniture... I would be an ottoman.
If I was a liquid... I would be horchata.
If I was a sin... I would be Sloth.
If I was a rock... I would be jasper.
If I was a tree... I would be an oak.
If I was a fruit... I would be a pear.
If I was a flower... I would be an iris.
If I was a climate... I would be temperate.
If I was a musical instrument... I would be a clarinet.
If I was an element... I would be xenon.
If I was a color... I would be green.
If I was an animal... I would be an otter.
If I was a sound... I would be a breeze through the trees.
If I was music... I would be jazz.
If I was a music style... I would be, more specifically, cool jazz.
If I was a feeling... I would be calm.
If I was a book... I would be a novel.
If I was a food... I would be a cerignola olive.
If I was a place... I would be an island.
If I was a flavour... I would be vanilla.
If I was a scent... I would be lemon thyme.
If I was a word... I would be "levelheaded."
If I was a verb... I would be "carry."
If I was an object... I would be a pillow.
If I was a part of the body... I would be the eyes.
If I was a facial expression... I would be a grin.
If I was a cartoon character... I would be Leela from Futurama.
If I was a movie... I would be Rushmore.
If I was a shape... I would be a circle.
If I was a number... I would be 7.
If I was a season... I would be early Spring.
If I was a sentence... I would be "I want to eat quiche right NOW."

My hovercraft is full of eels

2007-05-18T16:16:00.000-04:00

blackbird tagged me

The first rule of the game is to post the rules of the game. Here they are:

* Each player starts with eight random facts/habits.
* People who are tagged need to write posts on their own blog about their eight things and post these rules.
* At the end of your blog, you need to choose eight people to get tagged and list their names.

1. I kept my last name when I got married. I like my last name. I will now be Dr. H, just like my father and his father before him. It is possible that H will be my son's middle name.

2. I never thought of myself as coming from a medical family, but get this: not only were my dad and granddaddy doctors, my grandmother was a nurse and so was one of my aunts. And one of my cousins. The cousin who married an anesthesiologist. I'm starting to think I come from a medical family.

3. My mom's side of the family? Engineers. Structural engineers. And a Rosie the Riveter.

4. I love science fiction. My dad got me started, with a gift of The Gods Laughed, by Poul Anderson, and The Last Dream, by Gordon R. Dickson. I was hooked. I was maybe 10 years old.

5. I do 90% of my shopping online, including groceries. Have you every shopped for groceries in New York? It blooooows.

6. I'm eating an awful lot of Laughing Cow cheese these days.

7. While I was in grad school I studied Alexander Technique and shaved my head. The two were not related.

8. I shared the stage with Diana Ross in 2000 as part of her "comeback" tour. I shit you not.

I'm a reluctant tagger. So, you know, take this tag ~~and shove it~~ with a grain of salt: juliloquy, sgazzetti, aliented, and letterb.

If I can win stuff, anyone* can.

2007-05-16T15:09:00.000-04:00

So... a while back I started using Blingo as my search engine. The premise with the Blingo is that you can win prizes just by searching the interwebs. Though the chances of actual winning were slim, I thought, I signed up. Because free stuff is good. And then I more or less forgot about the idea of winning free stuff because it never happened, and I never bothered to switch back to plain old Google. And then it happened: I won free stuff! And since I had "invited" myself at an alternate email address, my alterego won the same free stuff. Which means that myself and I got $50 of free stuff at Amazon.com just now and we would like to tell you something: spending free money is more fun than a barrel of monkeys. So. This cat has a message for you:

You're welcome.

*UPDATED to add: Anyone, that is, who is a resident of the US. Clearly I am afflicted with the same Americacentric thinking the rest of my fellow citizens are. It's just that I want to share! Share the love!

Placenta brain

2007-05-15T14:59:00.000-04:00

Is it terrible that I want this?

Because I totally do.